A Return To Whiny Wednesday…

I know it’s hard to believe that someone as sweet and delightful as me could find things to whine about — but things present themselves daily. Why, I don’t even have to look, they just fall in my lap. With your permission, I’ll use this post to air today’s grievance, heavy as it is.

The Cashier

Some of you may not know this but I’m ‘a regular’ down at our local breakfast establishment. What does that mean exactly? It means I go to breakfast everyday at 6:00 am. How’s that for regular? I also order the same exact thing every morning. Am I scaring you yet? Anyway, I obviously enjoy it, otherwise I wouldn’t do it. There’s actually a small motley group of us.Β In any other situation we probably wouldn’t even acknowledge each other, but because we have the same strange daily habit, we have formed a curious bond. We know just enough information about each other to keep things pleasant but not enough to cause any of us to want to see each other outside of that situation. It’s like Groundhog’s Day rolled up inside an episode of Twilight Zone. Sometimes I imagine Rod Serling standing behind me saying his little monologue. Bwhahah!

That’s me in the window, in case you were wondering.

Where was I going with this…? Oh yes, I remember. Recently this little restaurant hired a new cashier, much to every regular’s chagrin. I thought our old one was just fine, she had the good sense to keep her head down, never making uncomfortable eye contact and keeping her thoughts to herself. Perfect. At that hour of the day, let’s be honest, that’s all you really want in a cashier.

This new gal, is way over the top, and by “over the top” I mean everything from her breasts to her volume. She’s much too perky, I’d say, almost cartoonish. To top it off, she looks and talks like a Stepford Wife. I’m still waiting for her to turn around so I can see if she has a wind up knob protruding from her back. For some reason she hasn’t quite figured out that the same people are there every morning, that we don’t need instruction on where to sign our name on the receipt, and that yes, EVERYTHING WAS WONDERFUL!!!!! Oh my gosh! She makes me hostile!!!! (What the heck is wrong with me? – Don’t answer that.) I feel that to the degree she is perky and slightly brainless, I must respond with an equal force of sullenness. I find myself having to channel Curmudgeon at Large, just so I can get out of there with my sanity in tact.

Deep breath. Okay, I feel much better now. I hope I haven’t frightened you. I did have two grievances but I’ll have to share the other one tomorrow. That’s all the moaning I can handle for right now.

Have a bright, beautiful and hostility free day!!

**Right now, Stephen, at Life’s Revelation, is formulating a new post which will address my significant issues.